A Privilege to
Serve
by Jonathan Phua
1 September 2006
“Do not think that
because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will
escape. For if remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance
for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your
father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to
royal position for such a time as this?” Esther 4:13-14
These were the words of Mordecai to Esther when Haman wanted to
destroy the Jews. When I read this portion of scripture, it dawned
upon me that the talents, abilities and blessings that I have were
not given to me for no reason. I must admit that I’ve led a very
blessed life with little or no struggles at all; getting what I
wanted was not much of a struggle, it was very much expected. But
clearly, there was something more to this.
‘From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded;
and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be
asked’ Luke 12:48
The words of Christ stated it so clearly, He wanted more from me as
I’ve been entrusted with much! But what was it that He wanted me to
do? He did not speak to me with bolts of lightning, clashes of
thunder, nor did I saw a burning bush; but His voice was a quiet and
gentle one that could only be heard after I developed an intimate
relationship with my Lover.
The opportunity came last July, when Pastor Joyce wanted to gather a
few of us for discipleship group. Not knowing what to expect, I
joined, since she asked me, But that very moment was a significant
milestone in my life; the Potter was beginning to mould this lump of
mud.
In the eyes of the world, I must have been a fool to jump onto that
opportunity. My A levels were coming up and I just burdened myself
with added responsibility. In retrospect, I’ve got no idea why I did
that, but I did it anyway. And I really thanked God for that
opportunity. Despite the incessant nagging and pressure from my
parents (who wanted me to do REALLY well for my A levels), I hung on
to the promise that He’ll never leave me nor forsake me and that
He’ll do all things good for those who love Him. It definitely
wasn’t easy balancing school work, church and crusade, but
nonetheless His grace was sufficient for me. He provided me with a
group of close friends who were always there to support me in prayer
all along the way. And I did achieved good grades in the end,
knowing that I’m not worthy of such grades (to the surprise of many,
I’m an extremely lazy person), but rather it’s Him who has done the
work!
If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied
more than all men.
1 Corinthians 15:19
The Apostle Paul led a life that was deemed pitiable if Christ was
not real, as all his hope was in Christ alone. While I have not
attained that level of living the life that’s deemed pitiable if
Christ was not real; that’s my personal goal, to live life that
would be considered utterly foolish if the whole notion of Christ
being the Son of God was a scam, as only then will I totally place
all my hope in Him.
It may seem totally foolish to others as to why would I ‘sacrifice’
Friday nights, Saturdays and Sundays in Church. Or what about taking
time to call cell members and helping the younger brothers out in
their walk. But I do not consider it a sacrifice; it’s actually a
trade for something even better --- joy!
Christ, Himself, looked beyond His circumstances and endured the
cross, looking forward to the joy that was set before Him (Heb12:2).
Looking back at how I struggled to balance my commitments, I do not
regret a bit, as I’ve acknowledged and recognized the joy that I’ve
found when the choice was made to follow Him when it seems to be the
most ridiculous thing to do. God has really changed me, from a quiet
introverted person who’s indifferent to all others around him, to a
vessel that loves out of the overflow of joy found in God. I’ve
learnt that true joy is only complete when the joy that is in you
causes others around you to be joyful too and that only can be
accomplished when you serve others.
What joy and delight it is when you see how God uses you to
accomplish His will and work. God can use anyone else, as what Haman
said to Esther, but He personally extended that personal invitation
to me. It’s really awesome when I interact with the younger
brothers, seeing how God is changing their lives, feeding them and
preparing them to be young men after God’s own heart. Yet I know
that I myself could not accomplish such a feat, but it’s Him who is
in me.
Post A levels. It was the time for me to decide where to go next. As
much as I desired to become a scholar and pursue biochemistry at the
much acclaimed Imperial College in London, He did not agree to that.
Taking that leap of faith, I did not apply for the scholarship,
though the temptation to do so was ever so prominent. Not knowing
where to go next or what to do, I submitted an application for a PhB
degree at the Australian National University. It sure was really
enticing, going to a stellar programme that only took in the best
from Australia; gaining a whole new experience of being a student in
a foreign land. But as things turned out, that was not His plan.
Later, I got to know a friend whom I was truly inspired by. His
dedication and passion for the Lord was truly inspiring. It was
through him that I’ve found my calling on where to go next. Hearing
him describe the nature of his occupation somehow fired up something
within me, telling me that that was it. It’s pretty strange; how I
was dead set that I would never want to go into dentistry or
medicine. But now, I felt that that was what He’s calling me to. A
year ago, close to the Easter period, a friend was just saying that
she thinks I can be a doctor. I just laughed at her remark, as I
thought that was unlikely to happen. Well, I did not exactly pursue
the track of a medical doctor, but something else happened.
The route to applying for a place in dental school was not easy
either. There were six hundred applicants with straight As applying
for only forty-two places in the faculty. My morale was brought to
an even lower point just after my manual dexterity test. The piece
of plaster that I carved looked utterly horrid, with pieces chipped
off all over; my wire pieces looked like a mess; the piece of
plasticine I molded looked nothing like a molar. I thought to myself
that that was the end. But again, there was that small voice within
me telling me that I would make it into dental school. And that very
night, the words given to me were ‘We live by faith, not by
sight.’ 2 Corinthian 5:7. How timely were these words? Living by
faith and not by sight. Living by faith that God will see me through
something He has called me too, and not by sight of the mess I made
during the manual dexterity test!
When the offer was made by NUS, I jumped at it immediately, forgoing
the offers made by ANU and the dental school of the University of
Melbourne. I knew that God wanted me to stay here and accomplish His
work here. And what great joy is found when I see the younger
brothers growing in the Lord. God has placed a great burden on my
heart to build them up, and it’s really my pleasure and delight to
be used by Him!
He’s been truly amazing and gracious to me, blessing me so
abundantly and granting the desires of my heart. I do not know what
the future holds for me, though I expect the next four years of
dental school to be extremely grueling. But just as how He has seen
me through in the past, I’m certain that He’ll see me through the
future. Though all that I want in the greater future is a stable and
normal life, if He wants otherwise, He’ll tell me so, and the only
way I can hear Him is only through a close and intimate relationship
with Him.
If you feel that God is calling you to something, go for it! It’s a
privilege to have the King extend a personal invitation to you. And
if He’s already called you, commit yourself fully to His work. O,
what joy there is when we delight ourselves in God! It’s not an
option to experience God, its essential!
Jon
